Silence Speaks

I don't wanna be lonely no more

Kth, oh Kth.

First I tried to be an smartass and apply for instep even though I had no plans (not really) of actually going through with it. At least not this semester. Then next thing I know, I got in. Now I feel like an asshole. Kth Royal Institute of Technology at that. Asshole. Period. I am a master at guilting myself.

Withdrawing would mean nothing much (lie), and yet not withdrawing seems neither here nor there (truth). Why did I give in to that tempting urge/desire/yearning that time? Now guilt is here to stay no matter what I choose.

Fuck. Where is Destiny when you need her? No time like the present to actually want to know how your life pans out. Not the entire life per se, that would take the thrill out of living but would a glimpse, a peek hurt? Come and see me in my dreams tonight...

On the other hand, I wanna go so badly that I might be even pondering a... :O Dare I say it aloud?! A 4 year instead of a 3.5. Sighs... Weak will.

Mugging date with the books this long weekend. Hope it turns out productive. Most of the time. See I'm a realistic person. And I'm going to make it even better, I'm limiting myself to 2h max of social stuffs. On offical hiatus after this blog post, bitches.

Is just another heartache on my list.



Goal for this semester: Pull the effing GPA to an effing 2nd uppers damn. Smoke it, bitches.

posted by wantington-ny @ 11:54 PM